It's a new week. It's a week full of possibilities and hope and wonder. No, it's not anything special--it's just as yet unknown, as every new week is.
Last week was... incredible. Incredibly good (at times). Incredibly hard (at others). Incredibly funny (mainly because of my children). Incredibly busy (as always). Incredible.
But it wasn't incredibly "bloggy." I was so glad to be able to share with you a few days, but I didn't share as much as I wanted to. Why? Well... here's the best way I can explain it... in the middle of the week last week, I read this post by Tricia Williford (Have I told you all about Tricia before? She is an amazing writer and woman--you really need to check her out.), and I thought, "Yeah, that's exactly right." Our circumstances are different, but she so often says the things that are in my heart. I write to be read. But then I look at the Google Friend Connect box to the left of her posts--242 followers. I look at Jamey's--119. I look at Patti's--560! And that's not even looking at the "big" bloggers, who are in a completely separate league. And I wonder, "Why do I write? Who is reading this? What do I have to say that other people aren't already saying a lot better than I ever could?" And I don't really know the answer. So I write... or I don't. It depends on the day, on how hard I have to work to carve out the time, on how much I am struggling with wondering why God brought me to this little blog in the first place. Yes, I know, we shouldn't compare--we should follow our own path that God has laid out before us. I get that, I really do. But it really isn't a jealousy thing--and that's something that I really searched my heart for, because honestly I struggle with that. It's jsut a question of... Why am I doing this? What good am I doing? I heard a fantastic quote the other day: "Only one life, 'Twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last." It's only been a few days, but that quote--and the interview that it came from--are already shaping me in major ways. (I highly recommend that interview, by the way. It's a 4-part interview with John Piper on the radio program "Family Life Today." Here is the link to part one, and you can find the rest on their web site as well.) So I'm trying to use my time and my talents and my resources in the best possible ways for this short time I'm here. And sometimes I wonder if I am blogging for Christ or myself.
Right now the answer that I have come up with is... the fact that I am taking such a hard, honest look at it means that my motives aren't entirely bad. And God has me here for a reason, and so for now I continue to blog. Until He tells me otherwise.
As for my FIA project... it got a little derailed last week. Starting on Wednesday, I didn't even look at my tasks/goals and I have no clue what they were. But as I said from the beginning of this post, it's a new week! I am starting fresh today. Mondays are health-related goals, and today's is to drink 5 (or more) glasses of water each day this week. This will be a good one for me--I am so bad about remembering to drink water. And tomorrow's task is to host a thank-you get-together for those who provided support for us when I went to Mozambique. I am really excited about that one. As of right now, I'm planning on around 15 adults--and another 15 kiddos will be out playing in our backyard. It should be a lot of fun. I'm working on a video now, and will share at least the first part of it here when I'm done.
OK, Roo has been upstairs talking to himself for quite a while now--I'm going to grab him before he wakes up the big kids. Thanks for reading, friends. I'm a work in progress, that's for sure.
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