Thursday, September 15, 2011

Monkey-isms

Here are a few of Monkey's latest takes on life...

Me: "Julius Caesar was a real person who lived a long time ago."  (Don't ask why we were talking about Julius Caesar.  It's a long story.)
Monkey: "Did he die?"
Me: "Well, yes, Honey.  He died a long time ago too."
Monkey (suddenly very serious): "Oh no.  We should pray for his wife."

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Forget creation vs. evolution--Monkey has made the most important dino discovery...
"Lamb, dinosaurs are extinct.  So if you smell something really bad, it's all because of the dinosaurs."

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His knowledge isn't limited to dinosaurs, though.  He can tell you about sharks, too...
Monkey: "Did you know that sharks don't have bones?  They're skeletons are made of cartilage."
Me: "That's right!  Do you know what cartilage is?"
Monkey: "No."
Me: "It's the stuff that's inside your ears and nose."
Monkey: "Wow!  LAMB!  Sharks' bones are made of BOOGERS!!!!!!!"

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And he's loyal, too...
"Mommy, if you get arrested and I'm still a kid and small enough to sneak past the guards, I'll use sharp scissors to cut you out of your cage."

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